What does your self-talk sound like? Does is sound something along the lines of you aren’t pretty enough or you aren’t good enough? Would you tell your best friend this stuff? Here’s a few secrets to begin talking to yourself with love and boost your self-esteem.
Let’s talk about the negative story you tell yourself. Ready?
Would you tell your best friend she’s not pretty enough? If she shared her excitement about her new relationship, would you tell her, I don’t know what he sees in you, you’re not pretty enough? I don’t think you would…right?
How many times do you tell yourself things like that? How many times a day do you look at yourself and say: “I’m not worthy. I’m not pretty enough. I’m not smart enough?” Today, I’m encouraging you to stop telling that story to yourself.
When you tell yourself you’re not good enough, and you tell yourself that over and over, your brain believes it to be true. It’s a form of self-sabotage. You can change this. It doesn’t happen overnight. It happens when you talk to yourself with love and acceptance and it becomes a habit and part of your daily routine. You know what? You are incredible! You are amazing! You are not damaged! You are worthy of love, and healthy, loving relationships; both with family, friends, and a significant other. You are worthy of all goodness. Let’s talk about how to bring positive self-talk into your life.
3 Things to Change Your Self-Talk
Become aware of how many times in a day you tell yourself you’re not good enough. Sometimes feeling not good enough that up as fear or not taking a chance on something important to you.
Here’s an example, you’ve been asked to do a training at work and negative talk is going through your head: “I can’t do this. I’m not good enough to do this. I’m not smart enough to do this. I’m going to mess up.” This is an everyday example from a lot of women I’ve talked with and something I’ve personally experienced in the past.
Let’s look at that same situation and change the conversation: “I am confident! I know this stuff! I’m going to deliver! I’m good enough! I know I’m the right person to deliver!” Do you see the difference? You’re telling your brain that: “I am good enough!” That’s how you want to look at yourself throughout the day, not just in this example, but every day, all the time! You are capable and worthy – always!
PRACTICE DAILY AFFIRMATIONS
“I am a compassionate person. I am a trusting person. I am a worthy person. I am enough. I am deserving”. What are the statements that mean a lot to you? What can you tell yourself every day, as you look in the mirror, to improve your self-esteem?
Here’s a few suggestions: Wow, look at that woman. Look at the self-confidence she has. Look how much she has to offer the world. Look how smart she is! This is me I’m talking about! I know this may seem a little uncomfortable when you first start, but I promise, when you make it a habit, and tell yourself how amazing you are every day, you’ll start to believe it and it will show in how you carry yourself with confidence!
Remember, first become aware. What does that mean? Be aware, when negative self-talk starts to pop in your mind, flip the switch and say: “No, not today. Today. I am a rock star! Today, I am enough! Today, I am making this happen!” You have control over how you speak to yourself, so choose your words wisely.
USE STICKY NOTES EVERYWHERE
Anytime I am facing a project, or something I feel is a challenge, I tell myself, “I AM WORTHY”, “I AM CAPABLE”, ‘I AM THE BEST PERSON FOR THIS”, you get the picture. I write whatever I’m challenged with on a sticky note and place on my bathroom mirror, on my phone, in my purse, and on the doors of my house. I am reminding myself how “Amazing” I am and how “I got this!”
I encourage you, when the negative self-talk starts to pop up, become aware and say – I hear you, brain. You’re telling me I’m not good enough. Well, guess what? I am good enough, and I am going to rock this today!
Today, go out and believe you are worthy of living your best life – because you are! To read more about how a journal can help boost your self-esteem click here.